


Hatred For Flowers

by Simply_A_Cherry_Bomb



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Angst, Hanahaki Disease, I tried being angsty, M/M, Vomiting, detailed description of blood, hanahaki is really sad tbh, hyuck is sad, mark is an ass
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-06
Updated: 2019-12-12
Packaged: 2020-10-11 08:13:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 5
Words: 8,258
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20542934
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Simply_A_Cherry_Bomb/pseuds/Simply_A_Cherry_Bomb
Summary: The thought of hating flowers never crossed Donghyuck's mind before, that was, until he started coughing them up.





	1. Chapter 1

Donghyuck kept his eyes on the raven haired boy that sat across the hall from him, as he chewed on his food. Mark Lee. His perfect brushed forwards hair, lying over his wide round eyes, and his high cheekbones raising higher when he smiled and let out a loud laugh through his peachy coloured lips. He was part of the basketball team, and had a role that Donghyuck never really paid attention to, because who even liked basketball (clearly not him). Mark was also one of the popular kids in his year, jokingly being called as part of the F4 (which was quite funny as none of the boys included were flower boys) alongside some guys called Lucas, Hendery and Xiaojun. Who were they? Donghyuck had no idea.

To be honest, Donghyuck didn't really know anyone else in his school. He only knew Jaemin, Jeno, Renjun, Chenle, Jisung, some guys who had graduated, and his one and only best friend Lee Minhyung, who apparently likes going by the name Mark now. But let's just make this clear, Donghyuck knew Minhyung, not Mark. He didn't know who Mark was _at all._

Because Minhyung was that adorable boy Donghyuck met back in 5th grade. That awkward kid who kept avoiding eye contact, whilst playing with his sweater paws. He was the cutest person in the world. The way he pushed up his glasses nervously and continuously licked his lip, although they weren't really dry and the habit was horrible, it made Donghyuck's heart melt. Minhyung used to like wearing oversized jumpers, (as although his body was nicely toned, he never felt the need to show it off, and especially not in front of Donghyuck who even after years of trying couldn't gain any abs) wore his glasses proudly - but that was mostly because Jeno once complained about being the only one to wear his glasses as the others in their group had bought contact lenses - and always leaned as far away as he could from Donghyuck's kisses even though it was obvious he enjoyed them.

But Mark Lee. Mark was something completely different. They had only been apart for a year, as Mark disappeared to Canada to live with his brother Chanyeol for a while before returning to Korea, however his entire life style had changed. He wore skinny jeans and tight shirt, clearly flexing the muscles he had since he was 16. Mark no longer donned his golden circular glasses, but instead found himself poking his eyes with contact lenses. To be honest, those weren't even the things that shocked Donghyuck the most. It was when one of the girls on the table (a nice one Donghyuck had spoken to once but never again after finding out how she had had over 50 boyfriends) leaned forwards to playfully plant a kiss on Mark's cheek, Minhyung would've pushed her away and told her about how he didn't like his personal space being invaded (since he did that with Donghyuck way too many times). But Mark didn't. Instead he hummed and moved forwards to accept the sloppy kiss that included some lipstick being stained on his pale skin.

So maybe Donghyuck's heart shattered at the scene. His former best friend was blending in with the crowd so perfectly that it hurt him more than he expected it to. As his eyes began to sting, he froze in his spot when he locked them with the so-called new heart-throb. A small laugh escaped Mark's mouth, before he shot a wave with his tiny hands in Donghyuck's direction and then turned back to his friends and laughed hysterically, whilst throwing his head back revealing his neck and bouncing his freshly dyed hair, at one of the jokes someone made.

The tears that had formed in Donghyuck's eyes might've poured out the second they broke eye contact, if it wasn't for Jaemin, who grabbed his face and shook it furiously, poking his fingers into Donghyuck's eyes in attempt to stop then from leaking.

"Lee Donghyuck," He said sternly, giving him a disapproving look, "You are not going to cry over a boy, especially since you laughed at me and called me an idiot when I did that."

He didn't mean to laugh and call Jaemin an idiot when he found him crying his heart out, with his hair sticking out because if sweat and his limbs tangled in his sheets. It was more like a reflex to avoid any heart to heart talks, as he was terrible at those however, ended up having one of those with him in the end (and his few words of encouragement such as "don't be a wimp and just tell him" actually worked out). Donghyuck didn't know what to say to comfort his best friend as he sulked over the fact that he had lost Jeno's cat (which was actually a stray he found in the streets), and now he wouldn't be able to face Jeno ever again. Obviously, when Jeno found out, he immediately forgave him, because Jaemin was more important to him than some cat he found on the roads, even if the cat had found a special corner in his heart during the five days he had known it.

But after that incident, Donghyuck had been teased for being heartless as he laughed at Jaemin whilst he was at his worst, so when they saw him on the verge of tears because of their former best friend who most probably forgot the memories he had made with them over the past years, it was scary, understandable, but more importantly painful to watch.

Donghyuck's lips tugged into a smile and he couldn't hold himself back from laughing. The others on the table, who were a little afraid of speaking and somehow making Donghyuck sadder than he was already, also began to laugh.

A few seconds passed, everyone stopped laughing, except for Donghyuck, who was now clutching onto his stomach and laughing.

"It wasn't...that funny." Jaemin muttered, staring at Donghyuck with confusion, earning a hum or agreement from the others.

The tears that were in Donghyuck's eyes fell, and his face turned redder than before. His laughing slowly changed into painful coughs and he jumped out his seat, gasping for air. Leaving the rest of the group oblivious as to what was going on, he dashed towards the bathrooms, scared that he already knew what was happening to him.

_Hanahaki._

Donghyuck burst into the toilets, hurrying into the first stall and thanking the fact that he saw no one else there. After managing to lock the door behind him, Donghyuck turned around to lean against the cold door, before coughing aggressively again. The clogging feeling he had in his throat worsened by the second, and he felt something at the back of his mouth.

With one last cough, Donghyuck bent forwards and threw up a single petal. The delicate red petal gently flew down swaying left and right majestically before landing on the dirty toilet floor. Seconds afterwards, Donghyuck dropped to the same ground, doubling over and throwing up a handful more before coming to a stop, panting to catch his breath, yet the horribly agonizing feeling in his chest remained.

Another tear escaped Donghyuck's eyes and he silently sobbed in the isolated toilet stall. His cries couldn't be heard by anyone, and even if they were no one would help him anyways. Donghyuck glanced back down at the crimson coloured floral leaf, disgust filling his body and he knew exactly what this meant.

_Hanahaki disease._

He was in love with someone and they didn't love him back. He was stuck in a stupid and foolish unrequited love that he knew wasn't going to get a happy ending like the ones people get in stories.

But that wasn't even the worst part of it all.

That someone that he was in love with was no other than Mark fucking Lee, or specifically the Minhyung in this Mark.

And Mark did not love Donghyuck.

And he never would.


	2. Chapter 2

Yangyang, Donghyuck's first and only boyfriend. The two were awfully awkward, and couldn't seem to keep their mouths shut for a minute. Both being loud and annoying, somehow ended up making an amazingly distracting duo whose main goal was to ruin the lives of the people surrounding them. Why? Because it was fun.

Donghyuck had met Yangyang just a few months after becoming Mark's friend. The three went to the same school, and although Mark wasn't in the same year as them, they quickly became really good friends, hanging out with each other every day. However, since Mark couldn't be in the same classes as the other two, Yangyang and Donghyuck began to get closer and closer, finding their childish antics a way to strengthen their weird friendship.

Donghyuck was the one to confess, holding his head high, shooting Yangyang a confused look, and waiting for a response. Yangyang, obviously, answered immediately and the two got into their very first relationship, that they didn't know was going to end so horribly. 

Only a month into dating and all the faults in the other started to surface. The way Donghyuck couldn't keep his insults in his mouth and how Yangyang was unable to handle Donghyuck's personality anymore. It was much easier when they were friends, and when they were faking a face that no one would be able to see through. But once they started dating, Donghyuck and Yangyang let their facade break, their walls dropped and their emotions came flooding out, spilling over the little bit of happiness they had together.

After a stressful week of important exams, Yangyang came over to Donghyuck's house, his head aching but the promise he made a few days ago forced him to drag his feet across the ground. Just as he entered the room, Donghyuck's high pitched voice rang in his ears, and the constant whining got on his nerves. He snapped at Donghyuck, pushing the other away and trying to recollect his thoughts, but the older had other plans.

Donghyuck grabbed Yangyang's arm (he thought he had done it softly, but it happened more aggressively than he had imagined it to be), and pulled him towards himself. But before they could get any closer, Yangyang pushed Donghyuck away, a string of insults left his mouth, making the blonde look at him with shock.

"Leave me alone!" Yangyang yelled at the end, panting as he caught his breath. A few moments later, once he had realised what he had done, Yangyang immediately rushes to Donghyuck, hoping to apologise, but the blonde only shook his head.

The words echoed in his head and he wondered if he really was  _ 'an annoying guy who doesn't understand limits' _ . He had heard it many times, from many friends, but it was always as a joke. Or maybe they were telling him the truth? 

And so, Donghyuck bowed down, shocking Yangyang before leading the younger to the door, shaking his head and muttering small 'sorriesys'.

For the next few weeks, the holidays got them all busy, and since there was no school, there was no excuse for them to hang out. And on the first day back, Donghyuck nervously walked through the school, waiting in front of Yangyang's locker, but the younger never came. He waited till the bell rang, and assumed he was late like always. But there was no sign of Yangyang at all. 

He later found out that Yangyang had left the school and transferred to another one.

Because of the horrible first relationship Donghyuck had, which only lasted about two months, he decided to change himself, so that his friends would find him more tolerable. The loud laugh that he had slowly became quieter, until it had changed to him silently giggling at things with a hand covering his mouth. The insults he used to throw at people without even batting an eye suddenly stopped, and although people were grateful that their self-confidence wasn't getting attacked every day by Donghyuck, they were worried by his sudden change. 

"Are you okay?" Jaemin had once asked, as he pulled him away from the rest of the group and gave him a stern look, which clearly meant that he shouldn't lie. Yet, when he looked at Jaemin, seeing the way he looked happier than he did before, he wondered whether or not he should tell him that he was forcing himself to become a nicer person, so that people would like him more.

"I'm fine Nana!" Donghyuck had replied, and he laughed when Jaemin didn't move an inch after his response, instead he kept his hand on Donghyuck's, trying to tell him that he didn't have to pretend in front of him. But even after receiving all that love and confirmation, Donghyuck shook his head, the (fake) smile on his face wwidened before he took Jaemin's hand in his own, tugging him back to the rest of the group. "I'm fine, so stop worrying so much!"

That wasn't the last time anyone had asked Donghyuck if he was alright. When Mark left for Canada, leaving Donghyuck behind, they all rushed to his house, barging in with no sense of shame or regret. Worry flooding them instead.

They had entered on Donghyuck laying in his bed, casually reading a book whilst flipping through the pages, seeming somewhat unbothered by the sudden disappearance of his best friend. At first, they were a little confused, since how was Donghyuck acting normal after finding out that the person he cherished the most had just left and there was no information about his return?

But after they noticed his red-rimmed eyes and the bin filled with tissues on the side, they all dropped onto his bed, wrapping themselves around him and patting him. He continued to ignore them, not knowing that they watched his eyes water up again and squeeze tightly every time he blinked. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Donghyuck entered his house, dropping his bag on the floor and locking the door to his room. He reached into his pocket, pulling out a single petal that he had kept from the incident and stared at it. The red colour glared back at him, reminding him of everything he didn't want to remember.

He had once spoken to Mark about the hanahaki disease. The two were sprawled across Mark's sofa, the television playing some old cartoons that they didn't care much about, and Donghyuck looked up at Mark.

_ "What would you do if I got the hanahaki disease?" _ Donghyuck had asked Mark, wrapping his arms around the elders and snuggled in close. He held his breath, waiting for an answer, and only let it go once Mark spoke up.

_ "I'd find whoever it was that made you fall in an unrequited love and beat them up,"  _ Mark turned to Donghyuck, a big goofy smile on his face and the thumping of Donghyuck's heart against his chest made him feel a little conscious of how loud it was. 

_ "Thanks hyung, I'd do the same for you." _

Donghyuck closed his eyes, feeling them water up again and tried his best to keep his breathing stable. When he had returned from the bathrooms, red and wet, the others didn't question what had happened, hoping that he would offer to tell them himself. He didn't, obviously, and chose to take a sick day off. 

Donghyuck's parents weren't home, so he wobbled over to his bed, his fingers clutching onto the soft petal and his vision getting blurry from all the crying. The pain in his lungs was still there, just less dominant than before. He wondered if that was because the flower had stopped growing, giving Donghyuck a break so that he could calm down and pray that it was a one-time thing before coming back and stabbing him from the inside again. 

With a small cough, Donghyuck climbed onto his bed, collapsing into the sheets yet still holding onto the petal. He brought it to his face, examining the dark shade that got lighter as it reached the tip. He would've found it beautiful because red was always his favourite colour, and roses had been his favourite flower, but watching it after it came out of his body, all because of his unrequited love.

The flower didn't look so beautiful anymore.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please check the tags again. I made a few changes to the story line.

Donghyuck sat up in his bed, his hands thrashed around in an attempt to find the switch for the lamp and his body kept jerking. By the time he managed to turn the light on, the itching in his throat got to its worst and he fell off his bed with a thud. His hands came up to his neck, massaging it as he felt a sharp thorn pierce into the skin in his throat. The metallic taste of blood reached his mouth and he closed his eyes in pain. Donghyuck let out a cry, leaning to his side as a petal made its way up the cut in his throat. It gathered at the back of Donghyuck's mouth and he let out a shaky breath from his nose.

A cough erupted from his mouth before he curled into himself, one of his hands coming down to his stomach as he coughed out everything in his mouth. The blood splattered onto the ground, immediately staining the carpet and the floor was soon decorated in a thin layer of orange petals. He took deep breaths, knowing that all of his coughs had probably woken his parents (who now knew about his disease and had suggested he got surgery, but he declined) and remained on the floor. The cold surface of the carpet pressed against his warm cheeks that had a pool of blood around them. 

"For fuck’s sake," Donghyuck whispered, and immediately regretted it when he felt the strain in his throat. It was as if something sharp had dragged its way up his neck, and then stayed there (and there actually was something there).

He knows he should probably get surgery done, get the flower out of his body before it damages him even more, but from what he's heard (read on the internet), the surgery isn't always successful. Many people have lost loved one to the hanahaki disease, and sometimes, the cause is surgery. 

It is a painful procedure, after all. They cut open the body, peel the flower off, gently separating the plant from the organs before taking it out. But it doesn't end there. The toxins the plant releases in the body, all the chemicals. It all needed to be removed.

Donghyuck got up from the floor, finally gaining the strength to push himself up and leaned against his bed frame. He took deep breaths, grimacing every time the air brushed his wound in his throat and then forced himself to walk over to the bathroom. He was going to clean the mess on the ground in the morning, but he had to get rid of all the blood on his face. 

As he entered the bathroom, the light from the bulb hit him directly in the face, and he squinted. With a sigh, Donghyuck stumbled over to the sink, his entire body feeling weak (and apparently these were the side effects of the toxins). His shaky hands opened the tap, and with a heavy heart, Donghyuck looked up.

He almost puked at the sight.

His hair was sticking to his forehead, the blood trailed from his mouth to his neck (and it actually looked more like a map of what the inner part of his body must look like), tears were mixed with the red substance and his skin was pale. He looked horrible.

Donghyuck leaned forward, groaning as he felt something sharp sink into his back. The flower had been growing rapidly and had managed to reach his lower abdomen. He tried ignoring the pain, but then soon the area got swollen, and Donghyuck began to take medicine for it. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


He should move on.

From Minhyung.

Minhyung was never going to come back. Donghyuck was chasing after someone who had left him years ago. The second he had changed his name to Mark and became the flirt that he is now, Minhyung was no longer part of him. The cute awkward boy had been replaced by a cocky and self-absorbed person. 

And yet, Donghyuck's heart beat faster every time their eyes met.

It was stupid. He hated it. Why did it have to be Mark? Out of all people, it had to be the one who changed and left him within a few months, just because he wanted to become a popular guy in his school. Mark succeeded, and Donghyuck lost (his best friend). 

As Donghyuck sat in his biology class, copying down the notes from the board, his eyes wandered to his left, catching sight of Mark - who apparently failed his test so was having to do it again (and Minhyung used to be the smartest person in their school) - winking at a girl a few seats away from him. He watched as the girl blushed, bringing a hand to her face and covering her mouth to hide her  _ ugly, hideous, disgu— woah,  _ Donghyuck thought, shaking his head as he realised what he had just thought. How could he have said such harsh words about a girl he barely knew.

Mark seemed to notice Donghyuck's gaze on him, so then turned to him, flashing a smile before looking back at the girl. The smile he sent Donghyuck's way was a friendly one, but not the one he used to send him as Minhyung. And the smile he showed the girl, it was more like a smirk. One that meant he knew what he was doing, and the impact he had on girls. 

It hurt.

It hurt so much.

Donghyuck looked away from the exchange of looks and brought a hand to his stomach, closing his eyes as he felt the stem of the flower grow a little. It happened every time Donghyuck remembered that his love was unrequited and that Mark could never be his. The flower was always there to torture Donghyuck, ready to have a growth spurt and slowly take over his entire body. The toxins it was releasing were getting more and more powerful, to the point that Donghyuck had fallen to the ground and stayed there for a while. His body was unresponsive and he panicked since it was after school and there was no one left.

He could've been on the floor for hours if it wasn't for his body's immune system to kick in and attempt to fight against the flower. It managed to get his legs and arms to work slightly, and Donghyuck hurried to fetch the tablets from his bag. He threw them in his mouth and gulped them down without water. A decision he regrets since they got stuck in his throat (alongside a stem), and took a while to actually swallow, but in the end, he had gotten his body back.

His parents had started warning him about the importance of getting the surgery done. He still didn't know how long the plants had been inside of him, and how long he had left before his body would fail on him. Honestly, he didn't want to find out.

He raised his eyes from his textbook one last time and saw the girl take a seat beside Mark and then slip her hand under the table.

It didn't take a genius to figure out what she was doing.

And with that, Donghyuck's throat clogged up for the sixth time that day, but this time, he couldn't go to the bathrooms.


	4. Chapter 4

“Lee Donghyuck,” He heard his name get called, and he tried to raise his head, but as he did, the itch at the back of his throat got worse. The thorn stuck in his throat scratched against his insides and Donghyuck only just realised he wasn’t breathing. “Are you okay?”

The question his teacher (or classmate, Donghyuck didn’t know who was calling him out) went over his head and he kept his eyes glued to the ground. The pain in his body worsened and he could feel a petal travel up his throat. Why did the universe hate him? He never did anything bad (except maybe make everyone’s life a hell) so why did this happen to him? Why is he the one, sitting in a room filled with some of his childhood friends and the person he loves, about to get exposed for having the hanahaki disease? Why did it have to be Donghyuck?

“Hey, are you okay?” The boy sitting next to Donghyuck (Hyenjun? Hyunjin? Donghyuck couldn’t even remember his name in that state) shook him, holding his arm with the softest touch, yet it still stung as hell since the skin was getting pressed into a thorn lying right beneath it. “Holy shit, you’re bleeding!”

He was? Donghyuck didn’t even realise blood was pouring out of his mouth, a petal closely following the substance. Donghyuck barely managed to bring a hand to his mouth when the petal reached his teeth, pushing with so much force that it slid down his lips, bringing along a small stem. 

“Shit! Someone call an ambulance!” Someone yelled, but all Donghyuck could see was darkness. When did the lights turn off? He turned his head, grimacing as he felt the flower inside him shift again, but everything was black. Was this perhaps the end? Was he going to die because of a stupid one-sided love? He was indeed an idiot, believing that maybe he could’ve moved on from Minhyung, who didn’t even exist anymore. 

Donghyuck heard some screams and cries from people, obviously shocked by the sight of their classmate suddenly throwing up blood and a flower was growing out of his body. He felt hands reach for him, pick him up, place him on a hard platform and then it started moving. Cold air hit him quite quickly, and shrieks from the students continued. He heard the sirens of an ambulance and blue and red was flashing behind his eyelids. But he couldn't open them. As every second passed, Donghyuck felt his body get torn apart even more. The flower was pricking his insides with its thorns. The same thorns Donghyuck used to love when he was younger.

Even when he used to play in his garden, Minhyung beside him. The two would run around and help Donghyuck's mum with gardening. There were many flowers growing that he didn't know the names of. Some yellow ones, a few purples ones, but the ones that caught Donghyuck's eyes were red ones. The blood coloured roses, sitting at the back of his garden. Donghyuck still remembers (in his horrible state of mind) the first time he saw them. Without a second thought, Donghyuck had grabbed the roses before immediately crying out as the thorns bit into his skin. His mum has rushed over and scolded him for touching her flowers without any permission. 

"This is a red rose," His mum had said, taking the delicate flower out of Donghyuck's palm. Her fingers held onto the stem, avoiding the thorns, and she looked at it with a fond smile. "A red rose is an unmistakable expression of love." 

She began to explain what the flower meant and at what times to use it. Donghyuck sat by her side, nodding along, though he didn't remember anything, but only listened in to the last bits.

"A dark red rose represents deep emotions, like heartfelt regret and sorrow," His mum said softly, carefully taking Donghyuck's hand and placing the flower back in his palm. Donghyuck quickly took ahold of the thorn-less area before he turned to his mum. She finally finished talking, and then got up, a hand reached up to Donghyuck's hair and told him to clean his own before it got infected.

The next day, Donghyuck snuck a red rose for Mark, hoping the older would like it.

He said he did, but Donghyuck saw him throw it in the bin halfway through the day.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


The buzzing of machines and the constant chatter of doctors was the first thing Donghyuck heard when he regained consciousness. He squirmed under the grip of the doctors and tried to break free. He felt his throat constrict and his eyes pooled up with tears. The feeling of something piercing his skin was all over his lower body and Donghyuck opened his mouth to let out a scream, but nothing came. The cuts became deeper and his skin was torn apart, slowly and slowly, so painfully that Donghyuck didn't know how he was still alive.

"Shit, he's awake!" One of the nurses cursed and Donghyuck forcefully cracked open one of his eyes, squinting against the bright light and looked around the room. Instead of finding the source of the voice, his eyes darted straight to his stomach. To be honest, all he saw was red. He couldn't tell where the flower started and where he ended. It was tied up around his skin, looping through holes and pulling on them in an attempt to stay together. As much as Donghyuck wanted the pain to end, he didn't want it either.

The nurse numbed an area of his skin, which was hilarious since he was feeling pain coarse through his body already and then poked in a needle, injecting some drugs to make him fall asleep. Just as his eyes felt drowsy, despite the agony he was experiencing, Donghyuck looked to his right, surprised to not only see a window pointing out to the family of the patient but also to see a certain black-haired male, who stared back at Donghyuck. Donghyuck felt his heart warm-up, and he swears he felt as if the pain subsided for a few seconds. That was, until a random girl appeared besides Mark, wrapping her arm around his waist and hooked her chin over his shoulder. 

Donghyuck's body shook violently as he watched the girl whispered something in Mark's ear, to which he smiled and then turned to the girl, whispering something against her lips. The doctor's panicked, not knowing how the surgery was going wrong. The heartbeat monitor went crazy with the number of beeps it let out and his body was not stopping. He shook so much that he nearly fell off the platform. A hand grabbed his arms, a stupid thing to do since he still had a flower stuck there, and it tried to hold him down.

He didn't exactly know what was going on with him, or why he was reacting in such a way, but as the seconds ticked on, the grip the flower had on him tightened. Donghyuck took one last glimpse at the flower tangled up with him. His heart hurt - not only because the flower was clutching onto it but because of the sadness that washed over him - his eyes watered and Donghyuck felt his mind empty out. He let out a shaky breath, the one he had been holding and surviving off, before glancing over at Mark.

And suddenly, Donghyuck hated red roses.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


"Mrs Lee?" The doctor said, quietly closing the door to the hospital room behind him. Donghyuck's mum jumped from her seat, eyes searching the man's expression and hands shaking around in panic. "I'm...I'm sorry."

That was all she needed to collapse. She fell to the floor, harshly coming in contact with the cold marble tiles and cries escaped her throat. The doctor bowed down, another apology leaving his mouth before he hurried away, feeling guilty that he wasn't able to save the patient. Donghyuck's mum stayed on the floor, surrounded by Donghyuck's friends, who were as teary as she was. The passer-by patients and visitors sent them looks of pity, but they didn't help much. 

"You," Donghyuck's mum choked out, scrambling to her feet and charging straight for Mark, who stood by the wall with his arms crossed. "You're the reason my son's dead! Do you even know what he went through because of you? The pain he experienced? The way he felt every time he saw you with someone else? Don't you at least feel bad for him?"

Mark stared down at the lady, his collar was pulled down by her and he didn't even seem affected. With a sigh, Mark brought his hands to hers, peeling them off his shirt before taking a step down. He looked down at her, no emotion present on his face as he said, "Honestly, I don't care."

Jaemin gasped loudly behind the group and immediately ran towards Mark, his hands clenched into fists and his anger toppling off the top. 

"How could you say that?!" Jaemin yelled, putting both his hands on Mark's chest before pushing him with a great force, making him stumble and trip on his feet. As Mark fell with a thud, Jaemin kneeled down and glared at him. "First, you left Donghyuck to go to Canada. Then, you act as if he doesn't matter once you returned, and now you're saying you don't care about your former best friend? Not even pity that he died so young and over the love he felt for someone so pathetic?"

Mark scoffed, shoving Jaemin to the side and stood up. He brushed off imaginary dust before he spun on his heels. The group watched as Mark walked away, not a single worry on his shoulders and they wondered why he even came to the hospital. The older boy walked around the corner before the rest fell back into a dreadful silence.

Donghyuck's mum held her phone to his chest, too scared to call her husband up and inform him about their son's death. 

She regretted ever allowing Donghyuck to sneak away with that rose.


	5. Chapter 5

Minhyung was in 5th grade when he met Donghyuck, the bubbly cute boy who sat next to him He always admired the way the younger would speak so freely, not giving a damn about what others thought about him, and he was always so proud of himself it made Minhyung feel better. 

But as Minhyung watched the younger grow into a more distinguished person, he felt his heart tug whenever he saw Donghyuck interact with someone with a strange familiarity, one that only Minhyung had with Donghyuck. He didn't like seeing the younger so close to people, that they would end up coming to Minhyung and ask him if Donghyuck was single. It was frustrating, and on top of that Minhyung felt jealousy every time they began to speak about Donghyuck. 

So when they rolled into high school, and Minhyung finally got reunited with Donghyuck (though the younger lived not that far away from him and the two used to meet practically every day), he despised it when Donghyuck would sit next to  _ Yangyang _ . Who was this Yangyang that Donghyuck seemed to treasure more than Minhyung? Why did he like to spend more time with him? Was it because he was younger, or perhaps since he was in every class of his? 

Minhyung used to watch from afar: Yangyang would huddle besides Donghyuck and the two would be in their own world. Their smiles would be so sickeningly sweet, Minhyung couldn't handle it. He tried distancing himself from the duo hoping that by making the two more unknown to him, he would stop feeling so aggravated all the time. The resentment he felt towards Yangyang had already resulted in a grade drop, and his parents were even contacted about it. He couldn't let his parents down because of a silly little  _ crush _ . 

"Yangyang and I broke up," Minhyung didn't think that those few words would be able to heal the pain he felt in his heart, but they did. Somehow, all the heartache he felt, sadness, disappointment. It all disappeared the second Donghyuck dropped the news on him. At first, Minhyung wanted to celebrate and jump around, glad that the person he liked (yes, liked, it was official) was finally single. But then when he saw Donghyuck's pale face and dark eyebags, a gush of guilt flew through him, and he realised how insensitive and selfish he was being. Instead of doing what he was going to do, Minhyung sat next to Donghyuck, squeezing himself between the younger and the armrest, and engulfed him in a warm hug. 

Donghyuck wept into his arms, constantly asking Minhyung, "am I annoying?" And, "do I really make people's lives a hell?". It hurt Minhyung more that it hurt him whilst Donghyuck was dating Yangyang. Minhyung replied to everything Donghyuck said, disagreeing with all the pessimistic points and then agreeing with all the optimistic ones. For the first time since they had become friends, Minhyung brushed away a part of Donghyuck's hair, before placing his feverish lips against Donghyuck's cold head. The simple gesture was enough to make the younger sob even louder. 

A few days later, Donghyuck was feeling better, but Minhyung still noticed the way his eyes lit up with a joke before they dulled down again. He knew Donghyuck wanted to speak and crack a joke, but he also knew that Donghyuck was holding himself back. He was trying to change.

  
  


-

  
  


Minhyung coughed in the middle of an English lesson, and it went on for a good ten minutes before the teacher told him to go to the toilet. He excused himself, holding his head down as the people in his class snickered at him, and promptly rushed out. The coughs get worse as he ran, and he wondered what was wrong with him. Just a few days ago Minhyung had gotten the flu, so how could it have come back again, and so soon?

"Shit," Minhyung swore, holding a hand to his mouth as he felt a more brutal cough approach him. Running into the toilets, Minhyung collapsed onto his knees, grimacing as he felt the water soak into his trousers and the discomfort spread through his body. His hand remained over his mouth and he began to tremble because of the coughs. 

Minhyung held another hand to his throat, caressing it as he felt something was stuck in it. He hadn't even had lunch yet, so how could he have something stuck there? Minhyung's breathing hitched a few times and he quickly got a bottle of water out of his bag (he brought it along with him since he felt awkward not taking it). He opened the bottle and chugged it down, the feeling of the cold water brushing down his sore throat hurt, but he guessed it was for the better. Whatever that was stuck in his throat had gotten swallowed and Minhyung let out a sigh of relaxation.

When he returned to class, he saw the way people gave him looks for him wet trousers and his red face. If it was possible, his face flushed even more and he messily brushed his hands through his hair, accidentally hitting his glasses. As they fell to the ground, the voices of the others became louder and Minhyung had to shut his eyes closed to try and ignore them.

  
  


-

  
  


The first time Minhyung coughed out a petal - strange, right? - was when had just come back from school. He was surprised but more confused. He held the yellow petal in his hand. It was clean. He examined it with wonder before stuffing it back into his mouth to see if he could eat it. When he couldn't, and as it forced its way back out of his mouth, it came out with a shade of red, this time. 

Minhyung hurriedly ran down his stairs, calling out to his mum, who casually dismissed him with her hand. That was until she saw the petal in his hand. Her mouth dropped and so did the glass in her hand. Her heart crushed the same way the glasses shattered when it came in contact with the ground. She forced herself to look at Minhyung, who only stared back with worry and concern. Her poor, innocent son had the one thing she feared most in her life 

"Baby, where'd you get that from?" She asked, hesitantly took a step forward, managing to avoid the glass shards scattered across the floor.

"I coughed it out," Minhyung answered, the smile on his face far too soft for what that meant. "Am I turning into a flower boy? Is that what a flower boy is?"

Minhyung's mum collapsed on the floor.

  
  


-

  
  
  


"We're going to Canada?" Minhyung implored, stumbling into the room after he eavesdropped on his parents mentioning his hometown. "Why?"

"Minhyung, come sit," His dad said, gesturing towards the seat in front of him. Once Minhyung sat down, a stillness followed. His parents shuffled closer to each other and Minhyung stared at them with confusion. "Minhyung need to get the surgery done."

"No!" Minhyung immediately stood up, his shaky leg making him bounce. "You know I can't."

"Donghyuck will not fall in love with you," His mum whispered and Minhyung looked at her with a face full of betrayal. How could she say that? She didn't know whether or not that was true. Donghyuck could fall in love with him by next week, and the flower would reverse on its own before leaving his body through one last cough. But he knows what happens after you get the surgery done, and he doesn't want to leave Donghyuck. 

"He could! You don't know that!" Minhyung was on the verge of tears and started backing away from his parents. "Donghyuck needs time to realise his feelings for me, I'm sure of it!"

"Minhyung…" A single tear broke out from his dad's eye and Minhyung's world came crashing down. The possibility that Donghyuck would never love him flashed through his head, and he wondered how painful his death would be if he continued with his one-sided love. 

With a heavy heart and a broken soul, Minhyung lowered his head, allowing all his tears to spill out, and then he turned to his parents, asking them what day they're leaving for Canada.

  
  
  


-

  
  


Minhyung regretted not telling Donghyuck that he was leaving for Canada. He regretted not visiting the younger one last time before he could get his surgery done. As he sat on the hospital bed, getting feed food and other drugs to make his body healthy enough to handle the painful procedure, all Minhyung could think about was Donghyuck. His eyes watered at the thought of the younger and he tried his best to not cry in front of his nurse, a nice guy that wasn't that much older than him.

"You'll be fine," The nurse, Taeyong, said, patting Minhyung's back and trying his best to reassure the patient. But no 'it's okay' or 'you're going to be fine' could help Minhyung. 

He closed his eyes as the doctors began to empty out the room and then filled it with equipment. The doctor gave him one last smile before putting on his face mask and injected him with an anaesthetic. Unconsciousness overcame him quite quickly, and the last thing he remembered was that he shed a tear, loving Donghyuck for the last time.

  
  


-

  
  


Mark watched as Donghyuck doubled over in his science class, blood poured out of his mouth and fell onto the ground. Mark's toes curled and he looked down at them in confusion. Why were they reacting so weirdly? 

The cries of his fellow classmates were stinging his head, so he scoffed and got up from his seat, ready to leave the room and probably hang around in the canteen, maybe grab a snack. But as he did, a hand grabbed him and he was dragged out of the room. It was apparently a teacher who thought Mark was Donghyuck were still friends and ended up pushing him alongside Donghyuck into the ambulance. Mark could see through the window that Jaemin and Jeno were left behind, and rolled his eyes. 

Of course, Donghyuck would do something dramatic like this.

The ride to the hospital wasn't long, thanks to the loud sirens the ambulance gave off, and the weird nurse, or whatever they were, next to Mark kept asking him questions about Donghyuck. How was Mark supposed to answer them if he had no idea himself? Did Donghyuck have any allergies? Why hadn't Donghyuck informed the hospital about how bad his condition had gotten? Who was the person Donghyuck loved?

Mark didn't really care about Donghyuck, but still gave answers out of instinct. Curse his body for speaking against him.

With a bunch of push and pulls, Mark ended up stumbling into a room with a large window. He raised his eyebrow at it as he saw Donghyuck get wheeled in and then placed on top of the stretcher. Was this even allowed? And even if it was, wasn't it only for family?

"Mark!" The said boy sighed as he immediately identified the voice, but chose to keep his attention on the boy in front of him. Donghyuck looked horrible. The blood he had been throwing up ended up drying across his face and his skin had holes everywhere, small indicators telling them where the flower had grown to. And when Mark's eyes finally met Donghyuck's empty and depressing ones,

he didn't feel anything.

He didn't feel anything as Donghyuck teared up, and his eyes looked at Mark with hope and love. He didn't feel anything as Donghyuck's eyes widened once the girl put her arms around Mark, whispering in his ear about how she was only here to miss out on her lessons. He didn't feel anything when he turned his head to the side giving the girl a little kiss and watching as Donghyuck's heart broke for the last time.

He didn't feel anything at all.

  
  
  


-

  
  
  


"You!" Donghyuck's mum screeched, and she jumped up from the ground, taking Mark's collar in her small hands and brought him down to eye level. "You're the reason my son's dead! Do you even know what he went through because of you? The pain he experienced? The way he felt every time he saw you with someone else? Don't you at least feel bad for him?"

Mark stared down at the lady he once thought of as his own mother. He looked at how devastated she looked, and the way her eyes were filled with hatred for him. Mark raised his hands, wrapping them around hers — and for a moment the heat from her hands reminded Mark of the time when they were younger, and when she would hold his hand alongside Donghyuck's and take them to school — before peeling them off his collar. He looked down at her with an unimpressed expression and said, "Honestly, I don't care."

"How could you say that?!" That seemed to annoy Jaemin the most since he squeezed through the crowd and pushed Mark with a force he didn't even know about. Mark fell to the ground and Jaemin kneeled down beside him. His glare burned into Mark's head, but the older still wasn't affected. "First, you left Donghyuck to go to Canada. Then, you act as if he doesn't matter once you returned, and now you're saying you don't care about your former best friend? Not even pity that he died so young and over the love he felt for someone so pathetic?"

The urge to roll his eyes were big, but Mark decided against it. Instead, he simply scoffed again, got up to his feet and walked away. Jaemin's words didn't affect him. They couldn't. After the surgery, any emotions related to Donghyuck had been ripped out of his body, quite literally. So when Mark had returned from Canada — and he had changed his name because he wanted to start anew — and when he laid his eyes on Donghyuck, he felt nothing. Not even the simple emotion of happiness, seeing a good friend after so long.

Mark walked through the hallways of the hospital, a little lost by the number of turns. He took a left and then was stopped by one of the nurses he met when he had just arrived at the hospital with Donghyuck.

"I'm so sorry about your friend," The girl, Yerim (as the name tag read), said, lowering her head. "We really tried as much as we could, but he had refused to get the treatment done. We really are truly sorry."

Mark nodded before walking past her. Again, he didn't feel any sympathy with Donghyuck. The younger had chosen to die by refusing medical treatment done, and it was all his fault, not Mark's. 

As Mark took another turn, he was stopped by someone pushing a dead body on a stretcher down the corridor. The face was covered with a white sheet, but Mark could make out who it was. The tiny body, curled feet and slender hands. Mark could tell Donghyuck apart from anyone. 

Mark stared at the body for a while longer as it passed him before shrugging his shoulders. He pulled out his phone to check his social media, and that's when a water droplet fell on his screen. He blinked at it in confusion and then soon more fell from his face. Bringing a hand to his cheeks, Mark realised that he had tears on his face. Hastily, he wiped them away, annoyed that his body worked against him for the nth time, before taking deep breaths.

He didn't care about Donghyuck anymore, but apparently, his body refused to let him go.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> @simplyacherrybomb on insta, you can get angry at me there


End file.
